Facebook Schmacebook

I took one of those Facebook quizzes today. Usually I don’t.  I think I took the one that told me what literary character I would be, and maybe the one that told me what color I would be.  But otherwise, I avoid them.  I don’t remember the results to either one of those previous quizzes.  But today’s quiz seemed safe.  It was “How Many Children Should You Have?” I’m over fifty (by 30 days), child-bearing out of the question, so why not. But I worried as I started to answer the questions that it would tell me I should have 1 or 2 kids, or maybe more.  Would I feel bad if it did? I don’t have any kids, so would I suddenly start going through some sort of maternal regret? Would that biological clock that never ticked for me suddenly start up?  TICK TOCK! making me run out and adopt 5 starving African children?  Then, the results were tallied: “You should not have any children. Sorry.”  Whew.  But then I had to start resenting that the quiz felt the need to apologize.  I was happy with my decision.  There was nothing wrong with my decision. And obviously, it was the right one.  For me.  No need to apologize.

Below the results, it did say, (and I sensed a sigh and jealousy), “You will have more money and sex than your parent-friends.”

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